Feb 8, 2016

The Perfect Year


Ring out the old, Ring in the new

A midnight wish to share with you

Your lips are warm, my head is light

Were we in love before tonight?

Oh, I don’t need a crowded barroom

Everything I want is here

If you’re with me next year will be the perfect year.



No need to hear the music play

Your eyes say all there is to say

The stars can fade or they can shine

Long as your face is next to mine

I don’t need a crowded barroom

Everything I need is here

If you’re with me next year will be the perfect year



We don’t need a crowded barroom

Everything we need is here

If you’re with me next year will be the perfect year



It’s New Year’s Eve and hopes are high

Dance one year in kiss one goodbye

Another chance another start

So many dreams to tease the heart

We don’t need a crowded barroom

Everything we need is here

So face to face we will embrace the perfect year.

Feb 7, 2016

The Friend Who Just Stands By


By  B.Y. Williams



When trouble comes your soul to try

Love the friend who just “stands by”

Perhaps there’s nothing he can do –

The thing is strictly up to you.

For there are troubles all your own,

And paths the soul must tread alone

Times when love cannot smooth the road

Nor friendship lift the heavy load.

But just to know you have a friend

Who will “stand by” until the end

Whose sympathy through all endures

Whose warm handclasp is always yours

It helps, someway, to pull you through

Although there’s nothing he can do

And so with fervent heart you cry

“God bless the friend who just stands by.”

Feb 6, 2016

The Baby


Where did you come from baby dear?

                Out of everywhere into the here.

Where did you get your eyes so blue?

                Out of the sky as I came through.

What makes the light in them sparkle and spin?

                Some of the starry spikes left in.

Where did you get that little tear?

                I found it waiting when I got here.

What makes your forehead so smooth and hight?

                A soft hand stroked it as I went by.

What makes your cheek like a warm white rose?

                Something better than anyone knows.

Whence that three-cornered smile of bliss?

                Three angels gave me at once a kids.

Where did you get that pearly ear?

                God spoke, and it came out to hear.

Where did you get those arms and hands?

                Love made itself into hooks and bands.

Feet, whence did you come, you darling things?

                From the same box as the cherubs’ wings.

How did they all just come to be you?

                God thought about me, and so I grew.

But how did you come to us, you dear?

                Go thought of you, and so I am here.

By George Macdonald

Feb 5, 2016

Piano Lessons from time past


Written by my aunt, Irene Vinyard Bennett, as a Christmas gift to the family in December 1997.

In her accompanying letter, she wrote,

This narrative version of the truth about our piano is my 1997 Christmas present to you.

It is fairly accurate, although I can’t remember exactly when the Osborns gave us the piano, but it was between 1953 and 1960.  Daddy built the “shack” in two weeks the summer I was 11 or 12, 1953 or ’54, and then he had the Jim Walter home built in 1960, the summer I graduated from high school and had eye surgery.  I don’t know why but I don’t remember moving the piano from one to the other house.

I don’t remember exactly when, or how I went about deciding to return the piano, except it was in 1968-69 when Phil and I first lived in Nashville.  Daddy died in November, 1969.

The Christmas timing made it a better story for the contest I first wrote it for.  Our local paper, the Augusta Chronicle, chose someone else’s work to publish on Christmas Eve, so I deleted most of the fiction and changed pretend names back to the real ones just for you, but I left the fictional Christmas reference.

               

PIANO LESSONS

“Whispering Hope,” the large group of post-World War II teenagers in Sunday School that day sang a cappella because the adult classes had asked the only two youth pianists, Ray Lee and Judy Osborn, to accompany them.

“That makes me SO mad,” Irene complained to her friend, Virginia Bailey.  “Why don’t the adults let them stay in here?  They don’t seem to realize that we need a pianist, too!”  A little while later, she said, “I think I’ll just teach myself to play, so we won’t have to sing without music anymore!”

“Oh, can you really do that?” Virginia asked.

“Watch me,” replied Irene.

Irene Vinyard lived in Hammond, a small town in southeastern Louisiana, with her parents, maternal grandmother, and five younger brothers and sisters.  Her father worked as a maintenance man for Southeastern Louisiana College on the north side of town, while Mama and Grandma cared for the children on the south side of Hammond, in their crowded, three-room home Daddy had built with salvaged lumber in 1953 during his two-week vacation.  They all affectionately called it the Tar Paper Shack because of its single-canted roof and black insulating paper-covered walls.  The paper was attached with roofing nails and shiny protective washers.  Somehow he never got around to finishing it with the siding common to the gabled-roof houses in the neighborhood.  Every Sunday they walked about two miles to the small Woodland Park Baptist Church for Bible study and worship.

At Sunday Dinner when Irene told the family about her idea, Mama frustrated her by saying, “We don’t have the money to pay for lessons, and we don’t have a piano for you to practice on.  I don’t see how you can learn to play.”

One Sunday afternoon Irene went to church early.  Discovering no one in the fellowship hall, she began with one finger to pick out the melody of a hymn on the piano.  Several years of school chorus classes had taught her to read music, and she already knew the tunes from singing in church services.  However, as soon as anyone entered the room, she stopped, self-conscious about her lack of skill.

Such a start-and-stop-and-start-and-stop method might appear to be quite ineffective.  But, week after week as she tried to play with one finger, then two fingers, improvement gradually came.

First, the soprano, then the alto, next the tenor and bass lines, individually and then together – Irene worked determinedly one afternoon on the song, “Wonderful Words of Life.”  Suddenly she clapped and shouted, “Hooray!  Hooray!!”

“What’s all the yelling?” asked Raymond Osborn, coming in the door.

“Success!”  she grinned.  “That’s the first time I’ve played a hymn all the way through with both hands.”

“Well, congratulations,” the family friend replied. “Who is your piano teacher?”

“Me!” she joked and then said, “Seriously, no one.  I’m just trying to learn on my own.”

“Keep up the good work,” he said on his way out of the room.

Not long after that exchange, Irene received a call from Mrs. Pottle, a local piano teacher and wife of the head of the music department at Southeastern College.  She said, “Irene, I would like to teach you to play the piano without charging you.  Can you come over Tuesday afternoon at four o’clock?”

“Of course,” a surprised Irene said quickly.  “Thank you!”

On Tuesday afternoon, Mrs. Pottle explained, “A friend of your asked me to teach you.  He thinks you have promise as a pianist, so let’s begin.”

For thirty minutes, Irene was thrilled, carefully following instructions as she played the marvelous baby grand piano in the living room of the Pottles’ large, two-story, white frame house with a wrap-around porch next to the railroad near the college campus.  Then Dr. Pottle arrived home.

“What is happening here?” he asked.

“Meet Irene, my newest student,” she replied.

“Oh, no,” he announced, “you are not taking on another student.  You have been ill and there is no way you can add something else right now.  You know what the doctor said!”

Irene sat in stunned silence until an embarrassed Mrs. Pottle reluctantly said, “He’s right, Irene.  I really want to teach you, but I can’t at this time.”

So after only one half of a piano lesson, a dejected Irene plodded home alone.

Later on a warm July evening, as the Vinyard family ate their usual beans and rice and cornbreadc supper, the phone rang.  Mama answered it and almost immediately said, “Oh, no!”  When she finished talking, she turned and said, “Raymond Osborn has had a heart attack!”

After his hospitalization, Mr. Osborn recuperated at home for several weeks.  The doctor thought the south Louisiana heat in an unair-conditioned office might be too stressful for Raymond.  On his first day at home, his wife, Emilie, called Irene.

“Dr. Aycock wants someone to be with Raymond at all times in case of an emergency.  Since I work in the mornings and Ray Lee and Judy both have other obligations, I need help.  Would you come and sit with him?”

“Of course,” Irene answered.

When Irene arrived at the Osborn home the next morning, Mrs. Osborn explained, “I need you here while I work from 8:30 until 11:30 and then I will come home to prepare lunch.  Each day my husband will rest in the living room and read or do his paperwork.  You may bring something of your own with you to do.  If there is any problem, call the emergency number for help and then call me at my work number posted next to the phone.”

“Irene,” Mr. Osborn asked, as his wife left the house, “how are your piano lessons coming along?”

“I’m improving, sir,” she replied truthfully, “but it’s hard to do when I only practice once or twice a week at church.”

“Let’s make this a useful time then,” he suggested.  “We moved the old upright our children used into the hallway under the stairs when we bought our baby grand.  Why don’t you play it every day while you are here?  I will correct you when I hear something wrong.”

Delighted, she headed for the piano stool and twirled around on it until it was the right height.  “Start with some favorite of yours,” he called from the living room.  So she tried Christmas carols, only to discover that except for “O Come, All Ye Faithful,” most were written in keys she had difficulty playing.  She decided to try an easier hymn, “The Light of the World Is Jesus.”

“No, no, no,” Mr. Osborn finally objected.  “Stop jumping around, Irene.  Start with Hymn Number One, “Holy, Holy, Holy,” and work on it until you can play it all the way through without a single mistake!”

Irene groaned, but complied – day after day, three hours each morning for two weeks!  Following the same practice pattern she used at church, she could soon play several familiar hymns.  For some inexplicable reason, flats were always easier to play than sharps, so she preferred songs with those key signatures.  More importantly, she definitely developed the habit of daily practice.  So, after her “adult-sitting” job ended, she returned to her sporadic sessions at the church piano.  However, she still wasn’t ready for an audience of more than one.

Shortly before Christmas, Daddy cut a small pine tree from the nearby woods, anchored it in a pail of rocks, and all the children decorated it.  Reading Laura Ingalls Wilder’s books about frontier family life inspired the Vinyards to make popcorn strings and cranberry rope of their own.  Presents, however, were meager.

On Christmas Eve, a big truck backed into the front yard and five strong men piled out of it.  With Daddy’s help, they unloaded the extremely heavy piano that Irene practiced on at the Osborn home.  Maneuvering and re-maneuvering, they finally managed to squeeze it into Grandma and the girls’ ten-by-sixteen-foot bedroom along side their two full-sized beds, a cedar chifforobe, and a bookcase topped with a black rotary-dial telephone.  As they called “Merry Christmas!” and drove away, all the children were shouting, “Play something, Irene!”

Excitedly she tried, only to discover that all eighty-eight keys were stuck hard and fast.  Not a sound came from that piano!  With disappointment written all over her face, Irene cried, “What an awful Christmas present!  Why would anyone give us a piano that we can’t play?”

Daddy explained, “The roof at the Osborn house leaked and dripped water onto the piano, Irene; and no one saw it until it was too late.  Raymond thought we might be able to save it enough for you kids to enjoy anyway.”

“But, how?” they all chorused.

An experience maintenance person, Daddy thought out loud, “The presence of a steady, low heat should dry out wet wood so it doesn’t crack.  Let’s hang a light inside the piano that will burn all the time,” he proposed.

He quickly installed the bulb and then instructed them, “Every day, I want each one of you to play every key at least once.” And, that’s what six children, and sometimes Grandma, did, day after day, until the sound of each ivory-less key slowly rejoined the piano.  A trained musician would have flinched at the cacophony, but to Irene and her siblings, the old piano made mellow music.

With everyone wanting to play, the home-grown piano lessons sometimes became so enthusiastic that Daddy had to yell for peace and quiet.  Everyone, even the boys, Charles and Gary, took turns plunking away, although not all persevered to conquer the instrument.  Soon the once-wet-now-dry Christmas piano added daily tunes of joy to their lives.

Ultimately Irene reached her original goal.  Her friend, Virginia, proudly watched as she, and eventually two other sisters, play hymns on Sunday morning for the sixty-five teenagers in the Intermediate Department.  Later, on Youth Sunday, the Osborns and the Vinyards all beamed with pride as Irene played the organ and sister, Paulette, the piano.  Of course, Irene used the foot pedals only on “Flee As A Bird,” the offertory she and Paulette had worked on for hours.

Irene decided her next challenge would be to play hymns she didn’t know, so she began to sight read and then deliberately to learn new songs.  Her skills grew until she began to accompany congregational singing at the SLC Baptist Student Union chapel services and eventually she became the pianist for Sheilah Baptist Church in Tickfaw, a nearby community.

Several years later, Irene learned an even different piano lesson, when Daddy telephoned her to say, “Ray Lee, the oldest Osborn daughter, asks that we return the piano to her.”

Shocked and hurt, Irene asked angrily, “Why would anyone want to take back a Christmas present?  Especially after all these years?”

“Well, Irene,” Daddy explained, “she and her husband are into collecting antiques.  For sentimental reasons she wants to redo the old piano she and her brother and sister used growing up.  You can understand her feelings.”

“Oh, Daddy,” she groaned.  “I do understand that they all learned to play on it, but we did, too.  I love that old piano more than anyone can imagine.  What am I going to do?”

“It’s your decision,” he said.

The piano represented so many joys and accomplishments, years of fun and work to all the Vinyards, how could she give it back?  Besides, it was a beautiful piece of oak furniture that she had dreamed of refinishing herself for her own home one day.  For a person who possessed little of significance, owning that old piano filled with memories really mattered to her.

“It was a gift, after all, and no one is required to return a gift, is she?” Irene argued with herself for days.

Then on the Sunday morning before Christmas as she played carols on the church piano, she smiled, remembering how difficult those songs had been to play that first day at the Osborn home.  “What would Jesus do in this situation?” she asked herself.

When the congregation sang, “We Three Kings,” the words bearing gifts kept repeating in her mind.  Suddenly her hands faltered on the keyboard, because she realized that on her long ago Christmas Eve, Mr. Osborn had come bearing not the gift of a piano, but the gift of music.  He had given her the opportunity to learn to play ANY piano.

Tears of gratitude slid down Irene’s face as she realized she could give the gift of music, too, by returning the piano to his daughter.  The beloved old family treasure would evoke memories, memories of piano lessons and life lessons that now included the Vinyards as well as the Osborns.  The issue settled in her mind, Irene humbly sang with the other worshippers as she played, “Guide us to Thy Perfect Light.”

THE END

Feb 4, 2016

Our Love Was Meant To Be


By Terry Matz


It amazes me

That out of the whole world

I would find the one person

Who would make my life complete …

And that we were both

At the right place to meet,

And at the right time

In our lives to fall in love.

It makes me so thankful

For all that happened

To bring us together

And once again I realize

That our love

Was truly meant to be.

Feb 3, 2016

Longing


By Matthew Arnold



Come to me in my dreams, and then

By day I shall be well again!

For then the night will more than pay

The hopeless longing of the day.



Come, as thou cam’st a thousand times,

A messenger from radiant climes,

And smile on thy new world, and be

as kind to others as to me!



Or, as thou never cam’st in soother,

Come now, and let me dream it truth;

And part my hair, and kiss my brown,

And say:  “My love!  Why sufferest thou?”



Come to me in my dreams, and then

By day I shall be well again!

For then the night will more than pay

The hopeless longing of the day.

Feb 2, 2016

Garden of Prayer


By Elaine Arnold



I have found a peace in my garden

That rarely I’ve found anywhere;

In the growing things

There’s a silence that sings,

So that mine is a garden of prayer.



Just to feel life lifting in beauty,

Up through the dirt and the sod!

In the growing of green

From the dark unseen,

I am learning the nearness of God.



I am learning the power of a Presence

As I walk in my garden there;

And I find that His love

Bring me peace from above,

For mine is the garden of prayer.

Feb 1, 2016

Being Family


Sometimes being family means more than just smiles and good times.

It means caring for each other and building bridges of trust …

It means not being afraid to ask and answer difficult questions …

It means accepting one another for what we are …

It means pulling together when things get rough,

Knowing that love will be there no matter what.

Jan 31, 2016

Because Someone Has Faith in Me


Because someone has faith in me

I cannot fail though all the way

Winds up the hills.

My staff in hand and cheerily,

I can but fare me forth each day

With right good will.



Because someone has faith in me

I need to keep my heart quite true,

My own faith strong,

My vision clear, that I may see

Undaunted by what meets my view,

And sing a song.



God help me sing the song, I pray,

God keep me clean and strong to go,

Clear-eyed to see

The untrod, upward-winding way,

For fail I cannot; One I know

Has faith in me.

Jan 30, 2016

Be Patient with Me


Be patient with me

As I am just learning how to

Feel love,

And sometimes I still get frightened

Understand how I feel

And how new this is to me,

Because I realize how very much

I love you.

Love is such a strange feeling

To have,

And sometimes I’m not sure if

I can deal with it.

I know it will take a while for me

To open up

And completely trust you

But I know it will happen

Because I want it to,

So, please,

Be patient with me.

Jan 29, 2016

A poem about me from a former acquaintance.


During my dating days, I was acquainted briefly with a really nice young man who wrote me a sonnet.  I kept it in a box and typed it up one day.  It was special to me because I felt it described our adventures to a T.  And so I post it here to remember days of old.

One day a girl – she came over

I felt like I’d found a four leaf clover.

We walked through parks with streams and trees

Skipping, jumping, very at ease.

We hunt and fish at our own leisure

Scaling and skinning, gutting for pleasure.

Also, when in my turck we do ride

I sit on the passenger side.

Hither and yonder, driving she goes

Clutching and shifting, dodging potholes.

I do not mind when she comes over

She is my own personal chauffer.

Thinking of her, I get melancholy

Her voice is a song – her eyes like a puppy’s.

So bright, so brown, tranquil they’re seeming.

But then look again, and you’d swear they were scheming.

She’s a girl, a woman, a companion worth mention

A give of laughs & smiles, not tension

Now it’s time that I be proposing

The eventual cause of this closing.

Before I do – I thought I’d mention, uh,

This girl, her name, it is Cynthia

-by Kenneth Harvey

Jan 28, 2016

Laugh Out Loud Books to read


Janet Evanovich

Karyn Bonsak

John Grogan

David Rakoff

Carl Hiassen

Laurie Notaro

Fannie Flagg

Laura Numeroff



Can You Keep a Secret? - Sophie Kinsella

Confessions of a Shopaholic – Sophie Kinsella

Shopaholic Ties the Knot – Sophie Kinsella

A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole

Mamma Makes Up Her Mind:  And Other Dangers of Southern Living - Bailey White

Being Dead is No Excuse - Gayden Metcalfe & Charlotte Hays

Skinny Dip:  The Series – Carl Hiaasen

We Thought You Would be Prettier:  True Tales of the Dorkiest Girl Alive – Laurie Notaro

The Idiot Girl’s Action Adventure Club:  True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy Life – Laurie Notaro

Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Café - Fannie Flagg

A Girl named Zippy – Haven Kimmel

She Got Up Off The Couch – Haven Kimmel

Little Altars Everywhere – Rebecca Wells

What Looks Like Crazy on an Ordinary Day – Pearl Cleage

Dress your family in Corduroy & Denim – David Sedaris

Me Talk Pretty One Day – David Sedaris

The Egg and I – Betty MacDonald

Mennonite in a Little Black Dress:  A Memoir of Going Home – Rhoda Janzen

Hypocrite in a Pouffy White Dress:  Tales of Growing Up Groovy and Clueless – Susan Jane Gilman

Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse:  My Life in Comedy – Phyllis Diller

The sex lives of cannibals – J. Maarten Troost

Fraud – David Rakoff

Planning and Frustrated

I hate trying to make plans.  I dream.  I make lists.  But to actually put something fun down on a calendar is just unrealistic.  Why?  Because my dreams/lists/plans don't ever come to fruition.

I'm frustrated.  I have wanted to do something for the past two years but every time I mention it to someone, I get shot down.

See, about 10 years ago, my dad retired from his job as a Process Operator.  He was divorced and all of the kids were grown and/or married.  He had nothing to hold him down at home.  No job to go to on a daily basis.  So, he retired after 35 years on the job and hit the Appalachian Trail within a week o his retirement party.

I'm a homemaker, stay at home mom, domestic engineer, whatever you want to call it.  I love my job but it is monotonous.  My youngest two daughters are now tweens and growing up too fast.  I have a desire to hit the AT also.  I don't want to wait another 10 years to do so.

So, I have put my adventure start date on the calendar.  Wrote it in and drew a big red circle around it.

With my dad's assistance, over the next 6 months, my girls and I will embark on Trail Training.  Starting out on flat terrain with just our hiking shoes.  We'll add inclines and backpacks about 6 weeks before our departure date. 

Dec 15, 2015

Update - 2 YEARS!!! Whoa!

GoodNESS!!  Have I really ignored this blog for over 2 years!!  That simply CANNOT be allowed to happen again!  I blame it on Facebook which is where I have been spending all of my time and uploading all (well, most) of my photos.  I started this blog as a way of keeping a diary.  I used to write in a book that is kept by my bedside but I stopped doing that at least 10 years ago.  So, I thought I would start a blog to keep my thoughts and ideas together.  Well, shoot, then I go and ignore it!  What in the world have I been thinking about for the past 2 years?  I can't remember yesterday let alone 2 years ago! 

Let me see, (digging through the cobwebs in the corners of my brain)....I'll start with my last post.  October 2013 - we bought a FEMA trailer to refurbish and set up for my oldest daughter.  Annnd, as per her pattern, 4 months later it was no longer needed.  She had moved in with a roomie and signed a 6 month (or so) lease.  Wait, something's wrong with those dates.  Hmmm.  Anyway, Fast Forward to present day ... the FEMA trailer was sold and we no longer have it.  Moving on to the next project.

The husband is attempting to re-roof our home with that new metal roofing instead of shingles.  It really looks good!  Well, the part that's finished does.  He seems to be taking his sweet time getting to the rest of it.  I need to apply a boot to his butt I suppose.

And on that note, I have a dream!  I dream of traveling the country.  I'm currently 48 years old and want to hike the Applachian Trail before I'm 50.  The problem is that I still have school age kids who keep me at home with their activities.  SOOOO, the AT will have to wait ... at least for another 8 years.  It's still doable then too, as long as my health and body holds up. 

I'm also thinking of purchasing a used short school bus and ripping out the seats to refurbish it into a tiny house on wheels.  Then I can hit the road and take my own bed with me!  The husband is more than welcome to join me and we can see the country together.  Hopefully, by the time we leave, the mortgage will be paid off and the only worry the kids will have is to keep the lights on at the house.  I would even allow them to stay there rent free, as long as they continued to be law abiding citizens and didn't do anything that would require bail money be wired to them. 

Okidoki then.  I guess that's all that's on my mind for the time being.  Christmas is coming up next week and all that jazz so I suppose I need to get my head out of the clouds and figure out what I'm gonna do about the holiday this year.

Later ya'll.

Oct 19, 2013

Our FEMA trailer

Soooo much to write here.  My oldest daughter has spent the past year looking for love in all the wrong places.  To make a long story short, the consequences of her actions have caused her to lose custody of her child and landed her in jail for a while.  Thankfully, a family member has custody of my grandbaby and I am able to see him whenever I want to.  Daughter, however, will have quite a few hoops to jump through when she is released from jail. 

In the meantime, after long talks and discussions, my husband and I have decided to help her out once last time.  Upon her release, she will have no where to go.  Since we also don't have room for her in our home (just too many bodies), we purchased a used FEMA trailer for $2000.  The plan is to remodel it and get it set up for her to stay in rent free while she works and/or goes to school to get her life back on track. 

After she's done with it, the plan is to sell it and get our money back.  Hopefully, with some remodeling, we'll also get back what we put into it.

Will post pics later.


Jul 9, 2013

Pennington: Clinic Visit, Sinus Arrythmia, and PVC


So, Friday was my last workout on the treadmill for the week.  Since the fitness center was closed on Saturday, there was no workout and since I was feeling so poorly on Friday, I decided to take it easy on Saturday.  Then I wasn't allowed to exercise on Sunday or Monday due to my clinic visit. 

Saturday morning, I had a little episode.  I was laying in bed and had JUST opened my eyes.  I rolled over to get up and felt a thud in my chest quickly followed by a lightheaded/vertigo feeling.  It lasted all of maybe 2 seconds and was gone.  My first thought was, "What they Hay was THAT?"  I got up and went about my day but then was paranoid for the rest of the day trying to figure out what happened.  I also had a dull ache in my chest which was part of what led me to forgo any exercise for the day other than the normal housework stuff.

Sunday came and went without anything unusual.  I ended the day by beginning a 12 hour fast for my clinic visit the following day. 

Monday, I got up early and arrived at Pennington at 7 a.m.  Male Nurse Tance called me to follow him and he led me into a room.  There he presented me with a 28 page questionnaire and told me to answer the questions by filling in the bubbles (you remember those don't you?).  While I got started on that, he proceeded to ask me some questions about my weekend.  Then he had to take my blood pressure and do some measurements.

Measurements for 7/8/2013 are as follows (You can see previous measurements here):

BP 138/80
Right Bicep 35.2 cm
Waist 124.3 cm (the Waist and Hip measurements were taken over my clothes)
Hips 134.2 cm

They called in Dr. Ron to discuss the thud and dizziness thing.  He told me something very interesting.  He told me that my preliminary EKG (done during the preliminary exams before starting the exercise program) showed I have a sinus arrhythmia in my heart.  What the heck is that?  He briefly explained it to me but I had to come home and google it for more info.  His THEORY regarding my episode is that I had experienced a PVC or Premature Ventricular Contraction.  Again my question was "What the heck is that?" to which he explained it was bit like a water pump that had lost its prime and pumped up some air instead of water resulting in low water pressure.  That was what he theorized happened to my heart.  The UNUSUAL thing is that I FELT it.  He told me that normally, everyone experiences it as we all get older but we don't feel it or ever know it happens.  He said about 15% of the population has this Sinus Arrythmia thing so it's fairly common.  His best guess is that now that I'm exercising more than before, I am building up that heart muscle and things like this are not abnormal and really nothing to worry about but if I got concerned to be sure and make an appointment with my doctor for any further testing.

Then they fed me a granola bar for breakfast and told me to come back at lunchtime and again at dinner time for the lunch and dinner as they did before. Then they gave me an activity monitor again and told me to have a nice evening and they would see me in the fitness center on Tuesday.

Tuesday (today) they basically tried to kill me.  I went in there after having 3 days off and the first thing they did was put me on the Met Cart to see what kind of progress I'm making in the respiratory area.  Then Ryan transferred me to another treadmill and set it to going.  Incline = 3.0 degrees, Speed = 3.0 mph, Time = 1-0-0 MINUTES! I said, "Are you NUTS!?" and he said, "Well, the Met Cart says you can handle it." Ryan continues, "BUT (I like that word) we CAN tack 5 minutes onto the next 4 workouts if you like and that will cut today's time down to just over an hour.  The Met Cart shows that starting tomorrow, you can work for an hour a day until next Friday. " I nearly shouted, "Yes PLEASE!" However, after an hours worth of work, I was DONE!  I'm exhausted today!  Thank GOD I only have to work out 65 minutes tomorrow!

Jul 5, 2013

Pennington: Feeling discouraged

I'm confused.  I'm not sure what's going on.  Since I couldn't go to Pennington yesterday, I completed a 4 mile walk at home.  It was hot, I was sweaty, I think I may have done too much but I'm not sure how.  I'd been walking the same speed, distance, and pretty much the same incline all week before.  So, what happened?  Maybe it was the heat yesterday.  After all, I did do the walk outdoors.

Anyway, I got up this morning and went to Pennington for my stint on the treadmill and, well, it was rough.  We started out 3.0 grade and 3.0 speed but 15 minutes in and I quickly asked them to bump it down.  I was having pain in the toes on BOTH feet and even the right shin!  My minimum heart rate zone is 127 bpm but when we bumped the grade and speed down, I couldn't seem to get above 125.  I felt like I was walking and sweating for nothing. I need to get my heartrate up to at least 130 in order for me to feel like I'm accomplishing anything.  The burn in the lower legs and feet is dragging me down. 

Is there any way to do this stuff without pain? 

I realize that I am a sedentary individual and that any amount of exercise will cause me some pain since I'm not used to exercising on a daily basis.  I just don't care for all this feeling sore all the time stuff.  It's nearly enough to make me quit.

This weekend, I will get a 3 day break.  I can do some sort of exercise tomorrow so I think I'll just go swimming.  Sunday and Monday I am not allowed to exercise at all due to blood work and other tests being done.  That means that when I return on Tuesday afternoon, those 2 days off are also gonna effect my Tuesday workout.  Yikes!

If anyone has any tips, please feel free to share. 

Jul 3, 2013

Pennington: Week 3, Thoughts on Food, Toes, and Walking

I know I sound like I'm whining a lot (at least I THINK I sound like that).  I woke up this morning just thinking about getting over to Pennington to endure my torture, er, do my walk.  My first thought was, "Man, I'm so tired of thinking about this stuff all the time!" 

On Monday and Tuesday, we bumped up the incline to grade 2.5 at 2.8 mph. This zone feels good for me but it isn't working my heart hard enough.  I'm having some issues under my 2nd toe on the left foot.  Have you ever ran around barefoot as a kid?  Ever step on a hot match or discarded cigarette butt that was still lit?  If so, remember that initial burning pain?  That's what I'm experiencing.  It doesn't start right away, it usually *pings* at 3.25 miles into the walk when I'm nearly finished.  Then it stings and burns for a while before I take my shoes off and rub my feet.  Afterwards, I'm fine .... until the next time I hit 3.25 miles on my walk when it happens again.  Pennington's PA Ron told me today that he thought it was Morton's Neuroma and that there's not much that can be done for it.

I'm a little tired of thinking all the time about walking and healthy food but I know that it will be goo for me in the long run.

Jun 29, 2013

Pennington: Week 2, 2nd half

Well, I haven't written in a couple of days so I'll try to do the best I can from memory regarding what I've done during my workouts.  I had Wednesday off and didn't walk or do anything that day.  I wish I had because when I returned to the routine on Thursday, my workout was a little harder and I received a bit of a surprise.  The Met Cart that I had done on Monday showed that my heart could take a bit more work.  I fully expected a change in intensity on Tuesday and when it didn't happen, I was a bit relieved.  Well, I then I take a day off and when I got back on Thursday I'm greeted with  "Good Morning Mrs. Cynthia! Your Met Cart readings show that we can extend your time on the treadmill to 78 minutes!" Say what!?!
 
So, I used my little towel and covered up the numbers on the machine so I couldn't watch the clock.  The speed and grade were kept the same as before at 2.8 mph and 2.0 incline.  At the end of the work out, my numbers looked like this.  78 minutes on the treadmill, 2.0 incline, 2.8 mph, 3.89 miles, 384 calories burned.
 
On Friday, I got nearly through the workout, felt my second wind and decided to suggest an increase in grade to 3.0.  At first, I couldn't tell a difference.  About 25 steps later though, Uh Oh.   I also noticed that a few more steps into the increased grade, I felt a strange sensation beneath the 2nd and 3rd toes of my left foot.  It felt like a pulling ligament or something.  When I curled my toes, the feeling went away.  On the bright side, by increasing the grade it reduced my time spent on the treadmill .... only by 4 minutes but still a little reduction.  If I bump up the speed, that will also shave some more time off.
 
Before leaving the facility yesterday, I asked again about working out at home on my days off.  Before, they had told me to stick to my regular routine.  But now, my regular routine has changed to include at least 1 hour walk.  So, yesterday, they told me to go ahead and plan a walk for Saturday (today).  When I went to bed last night, I was thinking about this walk.  Where would I walk? How long should I walk?  Should I split it in half?  Should I try to just go straight down the road?  Or should I plan a trip to the state park and do the primitive hiking trail? Should I do half of my time in the morning and half in the afternoon?  Especially knowing how hot it is out there.
 
I was ecstatic to hear raindrops at 6 a.m. this morning.  At 7:00 I was out of bed and talking with the husband about going with me.  So, at 8:30, my husband and I hit the road.  He ribbed me the entire way with, "You can't walk faster than that?" etc.  As we passed my dad's driveway, I saw my step mom strolling about.  I waved at her and invited her along as well.  She gladly joined in and made my walk much more enjoyable.  Knowing that on Thursday, according to the treadmill, I had walked nearly 3.89 miles.  I had measured a distance from my house in my truck and knew where the 2 mile mark was.  So, to get to that 2 mile point and back to the house, I would have to complete a 4 mile walk. 
 
Since I walked on pavement and had nothing to check my speed, it was a little harder for me to judge my pace. Ultimately, it took me just a few minutes longer today than it would on the treadmill, but I completed a 4 mile walk before 10 a.m.  So, I'm guessing it was still a 78 minute time.  I still felt a little pulling in the left toes and walked the last 1/8 mile with those toes curled.  What in the world is that about?! 
 
The bottom line is that I made a 4 mile walk and did very little heavy huffing and puffing as I would have done a month ago.  Even the little toe pain didn't kick in until nearly the end. I am excited about my progress.  For Sunday, I will be taking off but doing swimming instead of walking. At this point, I'm looking forward to the workout on Monday.

Jun 26, 2013

Pennington Workouts: Week 2, Day 2 - Mental Block

So, I finished my work out yesterday but let me tell ya how it started.

Woke up, got dressed, and hit the road.  I live a good 45 - 50 minutes east of the Pennington facility.  I can make that drive in 30 minutes if traffic is cooperative.  If not, it takes much longer.  Along the drive, I have time to listen to talk radio or whatever.  I also have time to pep myself up for the workout.  I am finding though, that I'm trying to come up with excuses to NOT work out. 

Yesterday, upon arriving at Pennington, I procrastinated for a full 20 minutes before making myself get to my assigned treadmill.  Even then, the little worker there physically touched my lower back and gently pushed me toward the treadmill saying, "Just get on it!"

Once I did, I was good.  I did the warm up and walked 3 miles (according to the readout) in less than 56 minutes.  The shower afterwards felt wonderful.

At what point does this exercise thing become habit and I no longer feel this dread about it?  Thoughts?  Please hollah!