I arrived back at the hospital that morning. There's really not much else to say here. I stayed by his bedside most of the day, watching monitors and taking notes. Nurse Frank was excellent in explaining things to me. My love talked and joked with us most of the day but later was getting uncomfortable and agitated. They gave him something to relax him and he began talking nonsense. in his sleep.
He'd wake up long enough to try to accept visitors. Sometimes, he'd doze while we were there. I'm sad that I didn't really get to talk to him much except the occasional "I love you" and "Please rest". Looking back, I should have, could have said and done so much more. If only I'd known.
On Friday night, at about 6 p.m, I had Melody with me. Since the night before was uneventful, I thought this night would be also. Melody and I went to eat at the local Cracker Barrel and then headed home. I had just pulled into the end of the driveway when the hospital called me to say that the love of my life had an elevated heart rate. The nurse said that he had a heart beat of 190 beats per minute and they had to shock him to get it down.
I was confused then and didn't know if I should stay home or go back to the hospital. Since I had Melody with me, I chose to stay home and sleep with my phone. We headed back to the hospital the second I opened my eyes Saturday morning.
All day Saturday, I was in and out of ICU. I'm such a stupid rule follower! When I went in, Nurse Frank was there again and told me that we needed to limit his visits this time. I said okay. And when his sons and older daughter came to visit him, I watched the clock. I was worried that their visits would tire him out. I went in once and gently asked them to go back to the waiting room in order to give him some rest. I regret doing so now. I wish we could have all just stood around his bedside. I'm so sorry for that.
Later that evening, everyone left but I chose to stay close by in the waiting room. Again, as a rule follower, I obeyed the posted ICU visitation times, not realizing that as his spouse, they didn't really apply to me. I went in and out of his room as the night nurse said it was okay. I would go up to the waiting room and try to rest a little then go back down to his room and pet his arm.
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